Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Five Tips For Getting Your Ex-Girlfriend Back Without Losing Your Self Respect

Think you don’t stand much chance of getting your ex girlfriend back without begging or apologizing for things you didn’t even do? If so, you’ve fallen into the same trap I did after my girlfriend walked out. Don’t feel bad; most guys react the same way in this situation. Nine chances out of ten, you’re doing the exact opposite of what you should be and it’s only making your ex glad she left.

Here’s what you should be doing instead:

Stay calm!

You had a fight, you yelled at each other, she told you she never wants to see your face again and walked out. Once you start to really feel you’ve lost her, panic sets in. You end up calling her every day, sending one email after another, and basically turn into a stalker before you realize it.

No woman in her right mind is going to go back to a guy who’s hunting her. Take a few days to collect your thoughts and then try a few times to contact her. If she doesn’t respond, move on to the next step, which is…

Talk to her friends! Not what you wanted to hear, I bet. Yeah, trying to impress her friends was hard enough when you were going out, but now that she’s spent hours telling them what a jerk you are, how are you supposed to approach them?

Unfortunately, though, when it comes to getting your girlfriend back, these are exactly the people you need to be talking to because they have the most power to sway your ex. If you can explain your side of the story and at least get a little sympathy, the next time she mentions you, they’re at least going to put in a good word for you.

Stay attractive!

Let’s face it, a lot us—both men and women—have a tendency to let ourselves go when we’re feeling depressed. Maybe you wear the same shirt for three days in a row or put off getting a hair cut for a little too long. This is exactly what you shouldn’t be doing. I know it’s hard, but you no matter how bad you feel, take care of yourself. Eat right, get enough sleep, and don’t skimp on personal hygiene. Not only will you feel better, you’re ex girlfriend will see you as someone worth being with.

Be open!

Once you get a chance to talk to her, you have to know what to say. Part of that means explaining what you were thinking when you had the fight that almost ended the relationship.

This is a hard one, I know. If I had my choice, no body would ever know I ever had a single problem in my life. In reality, though, you’ll be better off admitting that you were stressed out from work, family problems, or whatever than trying to cover anything up.

Getting your ex girlfriend back doesn’t have to be hard if you keep your self respect and tackle the problem head on. Stay calm and be honest about what caused the split and you’ll be well on your way to reconciling with your lady.

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Advice For A Broken Heart Heals Like Magic

Advice for a broken heart can work like magic and help to heal you provided you’re willing to listen and take the advice to heart. The primary thing is to use your common sense as you evaluate the words of wisdom given to you. Read on to find common sense words of healing that come from the heart as well as the brain.

The feelings of loss that come with a breakup can be really intense. Healing a broken heart following the loss of a love can take quite a lot of time. Nothing quite comes close to the sadness and the despair that are felt following the dissolution of a longstanding relationship. Sometimes you are simply going to want to get back with your ex, and sometimes you are going to simply want to forget them completely. Either way, it will definitely take some time for you to handle your broken heart. Regrouping and finding a way to get your emotions in order again is vital.

Rushing into a relationship for a rebound is rarely going to work out on a long term basis. This is the reason why rebound relationships are regarded as they are. Rather than rushing into something that is only to create more heartbreak, it would be wise to settle down your feelings and take things slow for a while so you can feel better. You can date if you feel comfortable doing so, but take it slow rather than rushing into something that will cause harm more than good. Don't get serious too fast if you want to recover from your broken heart rather than allowing it to rule you.

- Pause and take the time to regroup rather than rushing into dating, or rushing into trying to find a replacement relationship. If you come off as too needy, you will appear unappealing to most people out there. Take a dating time out, instead, and allow your emotions to be settled a bit before you make any rash decisions regarding your love life.

- Talk things out. Find a close friend and sit down with them, discussing things as thoroughly as you can. Listen to their advice for a broken heart and take their input to heart. Outside parties can usually be more objective than you during occasions like these.

- Do not try to rekindle things right away. You may feel desperate to get your ex back, but if you act desperately, things will get even worse. If your plan is to get your ex back, relax and take things slow. Play it slow and casual, begin things as friends, then let things develop slowly and only if they are really meant to.

It may be fruitful to date a couple of new people first, settling your emotions and calming your neediness down. Give your ex time to think about you, and to decide what they are looking for in life. When they see that you are doing fine and are not needy, you may begin to appear attractive to them again, which is an excellent way to slowly woo them back into your life. Just take things slow and play it cool, and if it is meant to be, it will. This is the best and most advantageous way to get your ex back, if that is your plan.

As you can see, some of the best advice for a broken heart is simply to give it time to heal and as it does you will indeed be able to move forward with your life.

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Saturday, May 30, 2009

Relationship Advice For Women Five Tips On Avoiding Heartache

As you’ve probably noticed, there’s no shortage of relationship advice for women on how to get a boyfriend or deal with relationship problems. The lack seems to be somewhere in the middle: how do you avoid bad relationships in the first place?

Know who you’re looking for

When it comes to our love lives, most of us spend way too much time trying to be attractive to men in general and not nearly enough on deciding what type of man we’re really trying to attract. I’m not counting those fantasies about the tall, dark, and handsome wealthy investment banker who spends his weekends pirating on the high seas, either. I mean really thinking about the important character attributes of your ideal guy.

Watch out for major contradictions in your expectations, too. For instance, if you love the strong silent type, don’t complain when your macho man has a hard time sharing his feelings.

Establish your boundaries

Boundaries, popularly known as “deal breakers,” are your signals to leave a relationship ASAP. They’re things like physical abuse, criminal background, and addictions.

Here’s the thing, though: you need to decide what your boundaries are before you get involved with anyone. Once you’re romantically and physically involved—or even worse, financially entangled—it’s way too easy to start making excuses for his behavior.

One good piece of relationship advice for women is to share your deal breakers with a friend. That way, when you call her up to complain, she’ll give you a nudge by saying something like, “But didn’t you swear you’d break up with any guy who did that?”

Learn the warning signs

Tired of getting hurt by the same things over and over again? Most likely your man radar is broken. To fix it, learn the early warning signs that can
show you when your love interest is likely to be a cheater, physical abuser, alcoholic, or whatever else it is you want to avoid. This way you can filter out the noise and focus in on the good men. If you need pointers, relationship advice for women who’ve dealt with these kinds of guys can help you out.

Listen to your gut

How many times have you heard this one? Well, it’s one of the most often repeated pieces of relationship advice for women because it’s so true. In relationships, more than anywhere else, a gut feeling alone can tell you when things just aren’t going to work out. Don’t ignore your instincts.

Beware of instant attraction

Just about all of us have met at least one woman who swears she knew she’d found her soul mate the moment she set eyes upon the man who’s now her husband. It does happen. Chalk that one up to instinct, too, I guess.

More often, though, instant attraction eventually leaves you dazed and miserable from a whirlwind affair that crashed in less than a month. If you feel yourself irresistibly attracted to a man you just met, take a step back and ask yourself why? If you can’t see any major stop signs, go ahead and get to know the guy, but take it slower than you normally would. A strong initial attraction should make you more cautious, not less.

Before you read any more relationship advice for women, take some time to get clear on your own needs and desires. Decide what kind of man you’re looking for and set clear boundaries and you’ll give yourself a much better chance of avoiding heartache in the future.

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What to Put in Your Online Dating Profiles

Online dating profiles can give you a sense of a person before you take any actions. For instance, you can see what they look like, how old they are, what their profession is, and what their hobbies and interests are. You can either be proactive and contact the people who meet your fancy yourself or put your profile out there and wait for them to contact you. Either way, online dating profiles make it easier to find someone who is right for you.

Here are some tips to help you build better online dating profiles that will help you attract as many dating partners as possible.

First of all, you should be positive in your profile. Don’t complain about your work, your last flame. If you are positive, you attract people like a magnate.

Too many people use their timid ness about using online dating profiles services in a negative fashion. They say “I wasn’t sure about this, but...” This doesn’t leave a positive feeling for potential partners.

Next, you want to be unique. Too many people say they want “long walks on the beach at sunset.” Try to stand out. One way to do this is to use the word “because.” For instance, instead of saying you like country music in your online dating profiles, tell people you like the music “because it speaks to the small town boy that I am.” Go through your profile sentence by sentence and see how you can make yourself unique.

Don’t be generic. Everyone thinks they are honest, creative and spontaneous. Give examples of how you live these values in real life. Tell stories.

Don’t fill your profile with sexual innuendos unless you are prepared for a lot of one night stands. People who are looking for long term relationships are turned off by these comments.

You can also use your online dating profiles to keep people who you don’t want to date from contacting you. Be specific about what you want. Don’t be afraid to specify the age group, professional status, looks, and temperament of your potential date. Also, be descriptive. For instance, tell a man that you would like him to romance you by going to a farmer’s market followed by a stay at a bed and breakfast in a small, picturesque town. Spend at least one third of the profile specifying who you are looking for.

Change your online dating profiles often. Add photos and details of your life. This will push people who were on the edge of asking you out over the edge to actually do so. It will also bring people to your profile who might otherwise have missed you.

Think about the short introduction you would make if you were meeting someone at a singles bar. While you wouldn’t have the benefit of thinking about it ahead of time, you would try to impress the person. With online services, you do have the chance to think about it. That’s how come you can make the best of your online dating profiles.

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Dating Service Women Perspective On Online Dating

Have you ever thought about using a dating service? Women and men both use these services, but the ratio is that more men will pay to get hooked up with a gal.

For most dating services, women made up 40 percent of the dating pool while men made up 60 percent according to a recent survey. Also, men are more likely to pay for dating services with many paid programs allowing women to register for free while men have to pay a hefty fee.

Why is it that when it comes to a dating service, women are so reluctant to “put themselves out there?” It boils down to women not wanting to be seen as the aggressors in a relationship.

Women want to flirt, to be teased, to have a little bit of a dance before a date is made. On a dating website, these women have to come out and say “I want a date. Here are the things I want in a man. Here are the things I offer.” That’s too blunt for many women.

But that doesn’t mean that men should despair about using dating services. For instance, while many women won’t start by putting up a profile of their own, they may browse through the profiles men have created. Once they see someone who looks interesting, they may be willing to create a profile so that they can contact the person.

Further, while the odds are stacked in favor of the women, there are still a fair number of women in the dating data banks.

Here’s some advice about how to use a dating service. Women love specifics. Don’t blend into the crowd. A lot of men say they like walks on the beach at sunset. Instead, say something funny or different.

When you do make a declarative statement in your profile, use the word “because.” I like foreign films because they remind me of the time I spent in France as an exchange student in high school. I like anime because I love my inner geek. Not only does this explain your choices to your potential new girlfriend, it also helps you refine what you write.

But, you are not just writing about the things you have to offer in a relationship. You are also able to write about the things you want in a woman you are dating.

Too many men don’t take full advantage of this when using a dating service. Women aren’t helped by general terms like “no psychos please.” They need specifics too. They need you to weed out the women who you would never spend more than one short date with. If more women were confident that a dating service date would lead to a relationship, more women would use the service.

So, when using a dating service, women need you to be as specific as possible.

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Aries As A Boyfriend

When you have an Aries as a boyfriend, there are some things you need to know. Your Aries guy is all man and he wants a feminine girlfriend. So, get out the make up, put on the short skirts, and play up your Scarlett O’Hara. That’s what you do when you have an Aries as a boyfriend.

An Aries as a boyfriend prefers an intelligent girlfriend, but he doesn’t want her to “wear the trousers.” You may find yourself deferring to his opinions in order to make him happy.

He wants his partner to be able to keep up with him.

Don’t play games if you have an Aries as a boyfriend. He prefers an honest approach from his girlfriend. He is psychologically in tune with the universe and is able to see right through any tricks you play.

Here’s some suggestions for women with various zodiac signs paired with an Aries as a boyfriend:

• Aquarius – You are both fun loving and adventurous. Your friends love having you around. Beware of trampling on each other’s individuality though.

• Aries – You’re both fired up by the energy of Mars, but beware of butting heads. Find personal, non-conflicting activities to keep your individuality.

• Cancer – Cancers who long for Aries as a Boyfriend may have to settle for friendship as this is not a good romantic match. While opposites sometimes do attract, the Cancer woman can be hurt by the Aries’ forcefulness.

• Capricorn – If you can learn to cooperate rather than compete, this pairing will do well.

• Gemini – Expect dynamite when the Gemini woman meets the Aries man. This can be good in the bedroom, but can lead to a lot of arguments in the home.

• Leo – These signs have powerful physical attraction to each other. The Leo can be a flirt which the Aries has a hard time handling. Leos and Aries must also learn the art of compromise if they are to stay together.

• Libra – The Libra with an Aries as a boyfriend needs to take caution with the relationship. The Libra’s search for harmony conflicts with the Aries’ adventurous, conflictual style.

• Pieces – The Pieces is a water sign and the Aries is a fire sign. That means that the Pieces woman can temper the Aries man. He’ll need to hold back sometimes to keep his woman happy. You are so different that you’ll be able to learn a lot from each other.

• Sagittarius – This is a good match. When a Sag has an Aries as a boyfriend, their wit, drive, and impulsiveness mean they get along well in the bedroom and out.

• Scorpio – Scorpios and Aries are both power seekers. When they learn to work together to get what they want, they will do well. An Aries man with political or business ambitions would do well with a Scorpio woman who likes to be “the woman behind the man.”

• Taurus – There may be a power struggle when a Taurus has an Aries as a boyfriend. Taurus’s have a slow and methodical approach to life whereas the Aries is always ready to get up and go. Over time, the Aries man may develop an appreciation for the Taurus’ steadiness while the Taurus woman may find excitement in her boyfriend’s spontaneity.

• Virgo – When a Virgo has an Aries as a boyfriend, she will often find herself in a power struggle. This combination on the horoscope may lead to each finding fault with each other. But while Aries is the leader, the Virgo woman will find the resources to bring them into fruition.

If you have an Aries as a boyfriend, take care to cater to his strengths while asserting your own needs at the same time.

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Dating Websites Online Give Your Love Strategy a Boost

The love letter generation, the chocolate giving period and the long courtship age is long gone; written in the history pages of dating. A lot of people now prefer to browse dating websites online. These types of sites are the newest and hottest form of dating. They allow you to browse through different personalities from coast to coast in just a few clicks of the mouse. This is what 21st century dating is about: bold, more elaborate, and more exciting.

If you attempt to use one of the many dating websites online as part of your new strategy to find a kind of love that you never found, or a new love; then you need to consider these few, but important facets that are part of most dating websites online:

Your Photo

Your photo, most of the time, will be responsible for making your first impression on others at the dating website you choose to become a member of. Always use current pictures of yourself; it is also necessary that you try to make a good impression by posting the most flattering pictures you have of yourself. Your photos should capture your personality. It's best if you can have a good mix of tasteful, candid, shots and professionally done photos.

Your Profile

Another major component of most dating websites online is a profile. You will have to determine the kind of information you would like to include in your profile. It's important that you don't treat your profile like a boring, autobiography. It's best if you can keep your profile light, witty, and make yourself a tad mysterious. You want the other person, after reading it, to have a real desire to want to know more and to want to contact you.

It's never a good idea to put false information in your profile, just to make yourself sound better. You should never start
a relationship under false pretenses. Remember, honesty is just as important as being witty and mysterious.

Knowing what Attracts the Opposite Sex

Most people who browse dating websites online are trying to find someone to get into the right relationship with; it is vital that you have an idea of what really attracts the opposite sex. By knowing this, you can better tailor your profile to attract members of the opposite sex.

Women, in general, are looking for men who are handsome, mature, confident, funny, stable, and interesting. Also; guys, at least have a clean, unwrinkled, shirt on in your photos. A little fashion sense can go a long way with women.

Men, on the other hand, in general look for women who are sexy, funny, smart, confident, and fun to be around. Ladies, while showing off in your profile picture in a bikini may bring you more messages than you can handle, it's also not recommended. Do you really want guys who are after you for that proverbial one thing? You can be sexy, but tasteful and still have a lot of success with those browsing the dating websites online.

Man or woman, if your looks aren't the best, don't fret. It doesn't mean you're doomed. Your personality can go a long way. You'll just have to put extra effort into what you write in your profile. Also, remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The more people you get yourself in front of, the better the chance you'll find someone who thinks you're the perfect match for them and vice versa.

As the new age of dating unfolds, don't you think it’s time to give your love strategy a boost, by checking out some dating websites online to join?

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